The Gift of Grace

   You know the type of people I appreciate?  Those who extend grace to me.  This subject of grace has been on my mind a lot lately.  I'm not sure why, but as I mature (Oh, brother I sound old), I'm realizing anew my intense need for grace.

   About 2,000 years ago, give or take a few years, there was a young, single, engaged woman who was found to be expecting a baby.  Mary had this wild tale, something about an angel appearing to her and the Holy Spirit moving upon her, and this was the reason for her sudden pregnancy.... Like I said, "wild".

   Her fiance was devastated.  He wasn't quite sure what to do.  He didn't really want to see her killed, which was the punishment for this type of indiscretion, but he also couldn't honestly claim the child as his own because it wasn't.  What's a guy to do?  I'm sure that he wrestled with the question for a few days, but he finally decided to grant Mary grace.  He let her off the hook.  He decided to divorce her quietly so as not to make a spectacle of her and instead allow her to live.  Soon after, Joseph had a wild tale of his own!  Something about an angel visiting him and telling him that Mary's child was actually the Savior of the world!  Wild!

    A part of grace is mercy.  It's when you know that something is suspicious, but you choose to realize that there are unknown factors in every story.  It's backing up and taking yourself off of jury duty.  

   Do you suppose that after Joseph claimed Mary and her unborn child, do you suppose that his reputation was still spotless?  How did the people in the village treat him and his new wife Mary?  Because now Joseph was, in a sense, admitting that he took part in fornication.  Were there dirty looks?  Did they begin to ignore Joseph?  Did they avoid Mary and cut off their friendships with her?  Did Joseph's business suffer?

    A story of epic proportions was taking place right before the villagers' eyes, but they were blinded by their own judgment.  They had no grace to give.  I wonder what blessings they missed out on because of their judgment?

   I have this friend.  Remember Patty?  She's the one who turned her pooch into an ice cube a few years ago.  You can read about that here.  Anyway, Patty is really good at extending grace to people.  Life has taught her that people are hurting enough as it is without someone kicking them when they're down.  She's been there.  She knows first hand just how rough life can be.  She has been a huge blessing to me the last 2 years.  When I was touting ideas that were judgmental and just plain wrong, she would challenge them and gently turn me toward the truth.  She then waited patiently for the Holy Spirit to work in me.  Maybe that's another indicator of a grace filled person.  One who is able to step back and allow the Holy Spirit to do what He does best in His own time and way.  He's always so gentle and kind... unless you're a hard head who refuses to acknowledge truth.  Then, watch out because you could be in for a miserable ride to the end of your resources.  Not fun.  

   Let's talk some more about the people in Joseph's village for a bit.  By all appearances Mary and Joseph were deep into sin.  It looked bad.  Really bad.  And yet, God was in it.  Everything was above board and legit.  But the whole situation appeared to be dirty.  Do we dare blame the villagers for their disapproval and disdain?  I probably would have drawn the same conclusion and I would have been just as wrong as they were.  

   Sometimes I have this way of thinking that I am just sure is Biblical and God approved.  I've even studied my subject out in the Bible and I'm positive that my stance is correct.  The truth is, that I've left out the enlightenment that only the Holy Spirit can bring. I look around and see people who do not think as I do, and I begin to feel superior.  After all, I'm an authority on my subject because I spent time doing research.  Then I get aggravated because if they really wanted to know more about God, they could do a little research on their own for crying out loud!  This way of thinking goes another step "up" and I begin to look down my nose at the ignorant masses then I begin to treat them as such.  I have just given in to the spirit of pride.  Pride is deadly.  

   Other people's judgment and pride probably made life hard for Mary and Joseph even though they were innocent.  Pride also sent many Pharisees and Sadducee's to hell.  They couldn't see the truth that was flesh and blood before them.  Did I mention that pride is deadly?   

   Anyway, I've been learning about the path of grace.  Do you know how freeing it is to let people off the hook?  It's such a burden lifted off of me to not feel the need to judge someone or constantly point out their sin to them, like I'm on some ultra holy (but misguided) mission to bring everyone I see to Christ.  I don't feel like I have to be on my guard so that I don't say something that might "encourage" them in their sin.  I can relax, act normally and let God do His work.  Maybe I'll be His mouth piece and maybe I'll just have to wait.  He'll let me know my cue.  It's great to be off of my self constructed pedestal and realize that I am not superior in any way.  The way of superiority ruins friendships, hurts both sides, and ends in loneliness and death.  Trust me, I've tried that way, I know.

   The way of grace is not condoning sin.  It's looking past someones sin, seeing their God given potential, choosing to love, and showing them the character of God.  It's living out mercy right before their eyes.  It's diving into their lives and building a foundation of trust but not becoming their Holy Spirit.  It's allowing them to see my struggles and Who I run to for help in the battle.  It's being real and not offering trite advice.  And it's all done with a pure heart that has no private agenda and does not desire earthly recognition or reward.  It's being like Jesus.  

    God has called different people to do some pretty strange things that on the surface appear to be sinful, but He always turns things around at the last minute and makes good come from shady looking situations.  (Think Abraham & Isaac, Ruth & Boaz)  That's just the nature of God I guess.  That's what God has been teaching me lately.  I've had to repent and I've been broken by my sin in the areas of pride and judgment.  People that I formerly shrugged off and dismissed, I now see in a totally different light.  I shudder to think that I might have added to their pain.  Oh, God grant me mercy!  Grant me grace filled thinking so that I can extend to others the mercy that You've given me.

  

Remember When...

As my handsome farmer and I celebrate 9 years of marriage this month, I was reminiscing about the years before children. Or even marriage for that matter! I was remembering when...

Dates were just expected. Every Friday or Saturday night (or both) we would be spending time together. That's just how it was.

Dates consisted of a meal and some fun activity.

It was thrilling to just hold his hand and be with him. That I am happy to report hasn't changed!

Our talks centered around each other's interests, what God was teaching us, and dreams for the future.

I could go out to the field at will and ride with my man for hours.

We had energy.

We could sleep in on Sunday mornings and still make it to church on time. I really miss that...

We rented moves that were interesting, thought provoking, or funny and lacked singing vegetables and curious primates.

Our vehicles were spotless and didn't smell funny.

Our carpet was pristine white and, you guessed it... didn't smell funny.

I did laundry once a week.

I was skinny.

Our lives have drastically changed since our little ladies have joined the family.  But I wouldn't change this stage of life for anything. Those two little girls have brought so much sunshine and joy to our lives and I'm so very grateful! Because now we...

Spend time as a family; laughing together and making memories.

Go on dates to the grocery store and hardware store. These dates may or may not include a meal. More often than not, it's fast food, but as long as I don't have to cook, I'm happy! I used to think such stores were boring, but I've since found that it's thrilling to find bargain milk. And new electrical outlets are exciting to purchase and even more fun to use!

Have our serious discussions interrupted by a charming little two year old who insists that we applaud her bathroom prowess! She's so squishy! It's impossible not to cover her in sloppy kisses. Plus we all get candy every time she "goes"! It's really a win, win situation! 

Squeeze the four of us in the tractor and ride back and forth while drinking pop and eating Skittles like crazy.  

Rest on the promise that there will again come a day when we won't have that glazed look on our faces and our house and vehicles will be orderly and clean. At least that's what "they" tell us. Those same people tell us that we should enjoy these days because they go by swiftly. I agree, and I already miss the littleness of my 4 year old.  I do enjoy that my girls are becoming a bit more independent though.  Call me crazy, but the 3 a.m. feedings of babyhood are killers.

Have found that singing vegetables are actually entertaining! Seriously, have you seen the silly song about "Pants!" It's a must see. I'm tellin' ya! It'd make a judge crack a smile!

I am learning to enjoy exercise! Ok, so that's a lie. I don't enjoy it, but it's good practice in sticking to something and following through. (I gotta find something positive. Forgive me for scraping the bottom of the barrel.)  Oh, and I only follow through on the days when I'm not too tired to exercise... Yeah, we'd better move on.

Nine years of marriage. Hmmm! You know what's funny? Sometimes I still look at my man and think, "Wow! I really don't know you!" And other times I'm amazed at how differently I handle problems that arise between us just because I know him well enough to know what he will, or will not appreciate. I've matured enough to be able to hold my own emotions in check and take a step back and care about what he's thinking and feeling. It's not all about me being heard or feeling validated. It's more about serving each other. I don't like that very much, but if I want a happy hubby and a peaceful family, it's what's gotta happen. 

Ha! My sense of humor has grown too! I've learned to laugh more. There are times when we hand each other the olive branch by way of humor. I can't tell you how many times he's made me laugh in a serious moment and completely diffused the situation. It's great! I had to learn to allow him to do that though. To let go and laugh instead of choosing to hang on to my anger. I'm pretty stubborn, but he's pretty persistent! Thank the Lord!

So, I must say that I'm a better person for having been married to the same wonderful, irritating, funny, frustrating but handsome and smart man for 9 years! I think that we're both better for having each other. I'm blessed! (And he is too!)

Posted with Blogsy

Princess of the King "Veggie Tales" Style

Oh, the wealth of knowledge that can be gleaned from Veggie Tales! No, I'm serious! Quit laughing!

When I was a little girl, I thought it was great fun to dress up in pretty play clothes and pretend to be a Princess. I spent hours imagining myself as royalty. It was great fun to order my invisible servants about. Depending on my mood I could be snitty, or play the gentle, kind, and benevolent princess.

Maybe that's why I began telling my little princesses made up stories about Kings, princesses, and the temptations that little girls face. They are always the princesses and the King is always God who swoops in and saves the day. Oh, the vast array of morals that a sneaky mother can weave into a simple little story!

My Princesses!

I know the challenges and fears that little girls can face. I think that, to a certain extent, every little girl grows up questioning her worth and her beauty.  Especially if her Daddy is absent, abusive, or just uninvolved.  This ole' world feeds her doubts and fears as best it can. Misunderstandings, thoughtless words, and misconceptions further the pain, and before you know it, you can have a confused and hurting little girl. One who is eagerly awaiting her "knight in shining armor" to come in and sweep her off of her feet. She imagines that she will always be loved, never misunderstood, and that her knight will be able to read her mind. What a set-up for failure!

I sheepishly admit that I was that type of girl. How disappointing to find out that my knight is a mere mortal who gets holes in his socks, forgets to take out the trash, and has been known to leave dirty dishes in the sink. It's not fair to my man to put expectations on him that only God can fulfill. While I think that my husband is awesome, and he really is my Prince Charming, he's not God and can't take God's place. God is the only true King of my heart. He never gets holes in his socks, doesn't generate trash (think about that one for a bit), and He always makes things cleaner than they were before He took them in hand.

The other day I bought my daughters a Veggie Tales movie titled, "Sweet Pea Beauty". On this DVD is a tale called "Snoodlerella". Yes, it's a goofy spin on "Cinderella". As I watched it with my girls, I was almost brought to tears. I know! It's truly mind blowing, but hear me out.

Snoodlerella is a young snoodle girl who has, "Uncontrollable hair, glasses, and braces, ill fitting clothes, and cumbersome graces." Now, if you're a woman, there are times when that description fits how you feel to a "T"! You may not have glasses or braces, but you feel ugly. I a lot of times feel like I have "cumbersome graces". If there is someone who is talented at being blunt, occassionally tactless, and unintentionally rude, it's me. My size 9 feet fit right nice in my size 63 mouth. Believe me, I know the frustration of feeling inadequate and just plain dumb.

There is a scene in the movie where Snoodlerella is sent to her room and this is her conversation with her stuffed animals.

"'Do you think I''m pretty?" She asked her stuffed bear.

'I want to be pretty. It just isn't fair.

I want to be noticed. I want to be treasured, and cherished, and loved.'

She said to her dove."*

I know, I know, I can just hear you now. "Outward beauty isn't the most important part of a woman."  But, it is important to her whether she wants to admit it or not. We all have a certain sense of security in knowing that there is at least one male out there who thinks we're beautiful. Be it a dad, husband, boyfriend, or even a brother, it's important. We want to be noticed for both inward and outward beauty because to a woman it's all connected. I'm sure that this is the reason why you see so many women and girls attempting to attract attention by their conduct and dress. They seem to think that if they can attract attention to themselves by their outward beauty, then maybe someone will see their inward beauty and love them for who they are. They're hurting and in need of someone to love them unconditionally. It rarely works out well for them.  They don't need our judgment, they need our love.  It's hard to look past the outer and see their inner pain, but with God's help, I'm learning.

Enter... the King! Just like in the stories I tell my girls, God is the true hero. It's the cry of every woman's heart to be treasured, cherished, and loved. And I'm here to tell you, that you can only feel/know those things completely in the love of our Heavenly Daddy. He really is the only one who can sweep us off of our feet and give us happily ever after. I'm learning this. Not only can He see the broken places in our hearts, but He is the only one who can heal the hurt. It's been a long hard lesson, but I think that I'm getting it. He knows me inside out. He connects the inner beauty with the outward and makes me complete. It's so, so, SO important to a woman that she knows that she's beautiful in both places. I don't know why, it's just how God wired us!  Sometimes we as women stomp that need down, try to bury it, and just ignore it, but who are we kidding?  It's a part of who we are as women and since God made us this way, it has to be a good thing.

So, back to our Veggie Tale. At the ball, Snoodlerella hears the cuckoo clock strike midnight and there she is, back to her cumbersome self. She turns to go home, but is stopped by a voice.

"'Excuse me. Young lady?', the voice asked.

'If I might, with permission of course, have the last dance tonight?'

'With me?', she asked, startled, as she turned to the voice.

'You must be mistaken, I'm an awful poor choice.'

'Who told you you're awful?' He asked. 'How do you know?'

'Can't you see for yourself? The whole world tells me so.'

Then onto the dance floor walked the King as He said,

'Would you like to, my child, hear what I think instead?'

Then the hall filled with music as the King took her hand.

She asked,

'Your Majesty please, I don't understand?'

'I think you're beautiful.' The King said as He smiled.

'I treasure you deeply, You're lovely my child.

I think you're beautiful. Your hair, and your braces, your

glasses, your clothes, and your cumbersome graces.

And many more traits which I could speak of,

There's nothing about you I don't truly love.

You're kind and you're honest,

you're funny and smart,

you're really quite charming, you have a good heart.'

'Your Majesty', she asked as a tear came in view.

'I'd like to believe you, is that really true?'

'Of course it is true, every word that I say.

Daughter, I am the King, and

I made you that way!

I delight in your beauty, you're wonderfully made.

I knew you before earth's foundation was laid.

You're precious to me, every hair on your head.

Daughter, hear and believe. The snoodle King said."*

Did you catch it? It's all right there tied up with a bow! The writers of Veggie Tales are genious. Of course they relied heavily on King David, but give 'em some credit for saying it simply enough for a 4 year old to understand.

Who tells us that we're not pretty enough, smart enough, good enough? Who? It's the enemy of our souls. And it's a lie! He uses a myriad of ways to convince us, but the underlying purpose is to squash our faith in our Heavenly Father.  Sadly, he's pretty successful.

We have got to start listening to the voice of Truth! God made us for a purpose! He thinks we're wonderful! I shiver when I think about the almighty Creator of everything, the One who rules in power and majesty, calling me "daughter". I can't help but be awed that I am a Princess of the King of Kings! I have His favor and His ear. My opinions, thoughts, and feelings matter to Him. He doesn't dismiss me, but He listens in rapt attention as though I am the only one in His care. He values me!

I imagine God, in all His beauty and power, sitting in judgment on His brilliant throne. It's intimidating and frightening! Yet, He stretches out His arm, palm open in acceptance and beckons to me.  He covers my tatters in His cloak of righteousness. He comes to me and bends down, picks me up, pulls me to Himself and gently dries my tears. His very being exudes love! Oh, the intimacy and relief of having someone know absolutely everything about me and loving me in spite of me! He enfolds me in His arms of protection and whispers to me of His forgiveness and love. Raw, majestic power comforting the weakest of the weak. It's His pleasure. It's His joy. It's His delight to do so for me. I'm not a waste of His time. Neither are you.

I'm learning to remind myself that God's love is a reality whether I feel loved or not. Kind of like that mere mortal I'm married to. Sometimes we don't feel like we love each other. Sometimes we're downright mad at each other, but I know that under the frustration, he loves me. He knows that I respect and admire him. I love him too, but respect speaks louder to the male species than our definition of love.

 Anyway, be encouraged! God sees you inside and out and He loves you and thinks you're beautiful whether you have "glasses, or braces, ill fitting clothes, or cumbersome graces".

P.S. If you had told me 5 years ago that I would write a blog post about this subject and honestly believe that what I have written applies to me; I would have laughed until I turned blue.  This post comes from a place in my heart that has hurt for years and is now in the process of being healed.  God has truly revealed Himself to me and shown me that all of the above is true of me.  It's humbling.  It's the cry of my heart that you read this and be touched by the love of our Daddy who sits on the throne.

*Everything in quotes was written by Mike Nawrocki and Mark Steele.

Posted with Blogsy

The Vacuum Cord

   My sister once told me that marriage and parenting will flush all the selfishness out of your system. Being naive, I thought she was a bit strong with her sentiments, but I wisely (for once) shut my mouth and took it with a grain of salt.

   Then I got married. No longer was I my own person. I had another human being to take care of.  Cooking, laundry, cleaning, helping, figuring out his likes and dislikes, moods, and a whole new family of in-laws to get acquainted with... and the list could go on. Honestly though, a man can mostly take care of himself, so while my new responsibilites took a bite out of my selfishness, it wasn't the whole chunk.

   Five years after the honeymoon, God decided that He wanted to start the process of ridding me of the rest of the selfishness lurking in the deep, dark corners of my soul. When the first morning/all the time sickness hit, God was in a sense smacking me with a large dose of reality. This parenting thing wasn't going to be so easy. After a hard pregnancy, and an equally hard labor, we took that tiny, itty, bitty, little scrap of a human home. I remember being in awe that they were actually going to let us take her home with us! I was excited, but a bit nervous. This beautiful and precious little soul was completely dependant on me for life and health!!! Scary stuff that!

   The first 2.5 weeks at home were nightmarish. I remember crying and wondering when this whole parenting thing was going to start being fun. FUN!! Yes, I actually thought it was all fun to be a parent and I was bitterly disappointed to find that what everyone had warned me about was true, parenting is hard work, sleep deprivation, and a lot of sacrifice! And before you come down on me too hard for not thinking that my children are fun... I DO think that they're fun. I enjoy them immensely, and wouldn't trade them for anything. They're God's gifts to us. But they do keep me hopping.

   So now we're a few years down the road and while the way that I take care of them has slowly become less intense. I'm still finding that there are rotten attitudes that I've been able to keep hidden when untested, but whoa, sometimes little things like wiley vacuum cords can irritate me.

   Lately I've found myself wallowing in a bit of self pity. My mind ponders such things as...

"Cotton pickin'! Another cold/soggy breakfast! And I even got up an hour early!!!"

"Seriously dudette, you just went potty 2 minutes ago."

"I've told that child 76 times not to hang on my blinds!!! How hard is it to obey!?!"

"Oh ug. It's bath time again."

"I want ME time, and I WANT it NOW!"

"Count to ten. DO NOT EXPLODE!!! Even though you have just mopped, muddy little shoe prints all through the kitchen will not kill you. Be thankful you caught her before she made it to your white carpet. Hold your peace woman!" (Sometimes a bit of self-talk is good.)

   Anyway, when I have those kinds of thoughts, God has been giving me a kick in the mental tush. Yes, my hubby is absent more than he's here from May to December, and I have to do a lot by myself, but my man is still around some and helps out when he can and does it cheerfully. I've got a mother-in-law who loves to babysit. And I get to stay at home and raise my children. I've got a lot for which to be thankful.

   Sometimes though, a girl needs a break. It's getting to the point now where, if my farmer and I don't get away for a couple of days, I just might go crazy! I'm really looking forward to our anniversary this year. We are hoping to spend a couple of days together... just us... what bliss! We both need to relax and just be. It's been kind of a stressful year and now that things are starting to slow down, we desperately need to unwind and be totally and completely goofy, quiet, serious, or staring at the back of our eyelids.

   My sister was right though, if you want to be the best spouse or parent that you can be, it's impossible to remain selfish. It's missing out on fun events because your child is sick, or staying up all night holding the puke bucket and then remaining cheerful the next day, or taking the time to administer discipline properly instead of just pretending not to notice disobedience. (Yikes, this one is probably the hardest for me!) Or cleaning up an accident on the carpet after you've just asked the trainee if she had to potty and she sweetly said, "No Mommy". Or when your hubby is preoccupied and walks past the laundry basket without taking it to where it should go, or when he forgets his shirt on the bedroom floor. It happens, and I keep reminding myself that it's not as big of a deal as I make it out to be. Yes, all of the above are annoying and frustrating and tiring, but my response is pivotal. God keeps gently reminding me that how I respond in each of the above situations is how my girls will one day respond. They really are watching me. My feeble argument sometimes goes like this:

"Ok, but God, you've seen my day, this is absolutely the last straw!!! It seems like everything in the universe is conspiring against me!"

   God's response is usually an eloquent silence. This is followed by the knowledge that while I feel like the vacuum sweeper cord is purposely being obnoxious because the deck is stacked against me, I know better. It's not personal. It's just an ordinary vacuum cord that happened to be plugged into the one outlet in the house that has a problem holding the prongs in the socket. The outlet is notorious for this problem and I know it. There is not some cosmic conspiracy attempting to complicate my day by sending an invisible imp to yank the cord out of the socket over and over. It's just life.

   God is using that ornery outlet to teach me patience and probably more importantly how to hold my tongue when I'd just like to blow. (Don't necessarily have that lesson down yet though.) So, not only am I selfish, but impatient, and mouthy. But I think that the root of my impatience and mouthy-ness is selfishness. I get a bad case of the "why me's" sometimes. Usually when I'm feeling tired, lonely and in dire need of some adult conversation!
 
   It's hard to live your life in service to your family, but it's rewarding too. It's a life of sacrifices both big and small.

   Like I said though, things are starting to look up. As the girls mature, my time is not as completely consumed with just keeping them alive. My handsome farmer has cut back on some responsibilities that were basically snowing our marriage. We actually get to see each other and have time to talk without interruption. That has been a huge help.

   We are works in progress!

Posted with Blogsy

Birthdays, Donkeys, and Harvest

   Well, first of all this peanut is having a Birthday!  She's 4 now and likes to think that she's pretty grown up.  She's gentle and sweet, loves babies, dolls and anything pertaining to dolls. She also likes to cook and I can't wait to turn the kitchen over to her in a few years! She likes her Daddy's donkeys and enjoys doing the chores with him.  She loves to wrestle with her Daddy and little sister.

  I remember 4 years ago how I desperately wanted this little girl OUT of my womb.  I had wanted to have a baby so badly that I never even gave it a thought that a pregnancy could be hard.  I just took it for granted that when I got pregnant that it would be easy and fun!  NOT so much.
   In my pride, I had vowed that I was not going to "give in" to such a silly thing as sickness.  I was convinced that it was just in a person's head to be sick.  Oh boy!  God took me down a notch or two in that area!  Mercy sakes!
  I was delighted that we were going to welcome a child, but I distinctly remember the day that the morning/all day sickness hit.  It was there to stay for the next 5.5 months.  Ugh!  I remember the days when the act of just standing up sent me running to the bathroom.  Some days I just decided that it was easier to crawl around on all fours.  As I was lying on the living room floor just wanting to die, I kept telling myself that it was all worth it and that this baby was an answer to my fervent prayers.  The whole pregnancy was dotted with one stresser after another.

   When they placed the smallest and most beautiful baby I had ever seen in my arms, I knew that the months of sickness and pain were definitely worth it!  She was such a delicate little creature with fine features, tiny little face and a skinny little body.  We fell in love at once.  It's funny how that Mama Bear instinct kicks in immediately!  She's worth every ache and pain, and every lost meal.  Her value is inestimable!  We are still enjoying her and all the fun quirks she has that make us laugh and love her more.

   I once again decided to make her cake.  No, it's not Pinterest quality, but it worked just fine for us!  Besides, it was very tasty and when it all comes right down to it, isn't that the most important thing anyway?

   So, we have miniature donkeys.  For a long time Daddy has been talking about getting a saddle for them so that the girls could ride.  Yes, I will admit that I gave a few eye rolls and really never thought that he was serious.  Friends, he was serious.  Yes, my girl got a saddle for her birthday.  I suppose that it's a good thing because it gives her and Daddy something to do together and will provide some important father/daughter bonding time.

   After I saw the saddle on the honk-a-donk, I must admit that it was a pretty cute picture!  Who knows, I might even go out and saddle up a donkey and lead her around!  She had a lot of fun with it until we put the saddle on a different donkey who isn't as beefy.  We couldn't tighten the saddle enough and so it rolled and she fell off into Daddy's arms.  That scared her and we had to force her to get back on, but I think that she'll do fine.  And if you're wondering, the donkey didn't have a problem with the saddle.  He didn't buck or try to fight it.

   In other news, harvest is in full swing and has been for the last month.  Because we can't seem to find dry corn, it is dragging on and on it seems.  As an observant person can tell, this picture was taken a month ago while we were still combining beans.

   This little farmer girl was gearing up for harvest and was "helping" Daddy wash the tractor.  

   And while we are on the subject of my youngest, it seems like she can't smile without putting her whole little body into it!  If you want a real smile from her, you will automatically get the shoulders and arms involved.  It's just one of those quirks that make her unique.  Love that little girl!

   Well, that about sums it up for now!  Have a fantastical day!

   

Twists & Turns

Isn't it amazing the different twists and turns that life can take? I'm constantly amazed at how, just when you think that you can't come to a much sharper curve, the road takes an unexpected turn in the opposite direction.
Recently our family had just such a twist in the road. After months of prayer and fasting, we made the hard decision to leave our church and begin the search for a new church home. It wasn't an easy decison to make, but we felt that God was leading us in that direction. Our reasons are varied and many, but I really don't wish to discuss them.
We are totally depending on God to show us the way and where He wants us. It feels scary sometimes, but I am making a point to surrender our past, present, and future to Him.
There are a few hymns that are really sweet to me right now. "I Surrender All" is one of them. I guess that it's fairly self-explanitory, but the first verse says it all:

"All to Jesus, I surrender,

All to Him I freely give.

I will ever love and trust Him,

In His presence daily live.

I surrender all, I surrender all,

All to Thee my blessed Saviour, I surrender all."

I'm not quite sure why God has brought us to this place but He has, and it's my privilege to hang onto Him for the ride. I am learning to come to the place of giving Him everything and doing it freely. I have a tendency to want to hang onto certain little things that are important to me, but He is teaching me to give every thing up to Him. My rights, my wrongs, my ways of thinking, my preconcieved notions, my attitudes... everything! Trusting Him that He knows what He's doing and has our lives in the palm of His mighty hand. It's not always easy. I have a lot of questions, but I am choosing to rest in His love and care for us.

I'm reading a book right now titled, "The Release of the Spirit" by Watchman Nee. What a great book! I'm able to see just how God is using this time in our lives for good. I'm learning so much and I'm so grateful to Him for leading us all the way!
The book talks about brokeness. It's not easy being broken. In plain English, it stinks! As I've read this book, I've come to see the necessity of being broken before Him. Brokeness allows His Spirit to pour out through the cracks to those around me. I will admit that I've not been very good at that in the past... allowing God to work through me. I can tend to be judgmental. Bringing the gavel of finality down upon someone when I don't have the whole story. I am a bit more understanding now. I can more easily give grace to the hurting. Besides, I have no business carrying around a gavel! That's Christ's job and His alone!
I am easily intimidated at times. I'm afraid of men (and women!) and their opinions of me. I'm terrified that I'm going to say or do the wrong thing. What I've failed to realize is that, if I allow the Holy Spirit to pour out of me, those worries won't even be a concern. It won't be me speaking and conversing with people, it will be the Spirit of Christ in me, leading me to say and do the things that are appropriate for the time and situation. But in order for the Spirit to pour out of me, I have to be broken. The part of me that wants desperately to have people think well of me at all costs has to die. I'm slowly learning what God wants of me. He has been so gentle and faithful in leading me along the way. He has infinite patience with me when I screw up. He so kindly and mercifully leads me back into His presence and there I find love, forgiveness, and a 293rd chance to try again.
Anyway, this is where I'm at folks! This is what God is teaching me lately. I'm grateful to Him for loving me enough to allow me to be broken to make me a vessel fit for His service. Those words come at a cost, but they are honest.
May God richly bless you today!

Posted with Blogsy

Catching Up

   It's been a while since my last blog post so I thought I'd catch you up in the form of pictures for the sake of all my family who is out of state, so here it goes...

   My three year old wanted to plant some seeds this spring, so I bought her a pack of zinnias.  I helped her plant them and this is the beauty that sprang forth.  She was pretty faithful to water them and enjoyed watching them grow.  

   Earlier this month my baby had a B-day.  She's now a terrific two!  Yes, I decorated the cake.  Yes, I got the idea off of Pinterest, and yes, it had to be something fairly un-creative for this artistically challenged Mommy.  

   I even made each layer a different color.  Aside from that, everyone wants to know... was it good?  YES!  It was stinkin' good if I do say so myself.  Not exactly diet friendly, but very delish.  And yes, my hair is wonky.  Just ignore that and look at the cake or the very cute 2 year old.  Moving on...

   This combo of new stroller and doll carried the day in favorites.  Notice how the picture is blurry?  I couldn't get her to stand still while I took a picture.  She was super excited to have a new baby.  You should have seen the pure joy that registered on that little face.  The sun had nothin' on her.

   This is a random shot of them playing "boat".  The bathtub was the boat and they were floating down the river.  Daddy was actually in there with them, but I didn't get there in time to capture that.  You should have heard their wild made up stories as they cruised down the river.  I should have filmed it, but the Papa is a bit "film" shy.  Something about the Mommy putting it on her blog... I don't know where he gets those kinds of funny ideas.

   The girls cheering for their favorite team.  We don't know much about football, but we do enjoy the food that Grandma makes on game days.  

   Honestly, I have no idea who this is.  (My oldest could tell you.)  But since we've had like three babies since the spring, I thought I'd add a picture of a honk a donk cuz they do live here and occasionally interrupt my beauty sleep.

   And last, but not least, my big girl thinks that she's hot stuff because she can now carry around her little sister.  It's hard to tell, but she really is carrying her.  That kid is strong!  She can lift about 60% of her own body weight.  It blows my mind because she has these little spaghetti string arms.  

   Anyway, that's a little bit of catch up.  More to come! 

Pennsylvania

   Whew!  Last week passed in somewhat of a blur!  Busy, but fun!  The girls and I took a trip to Pennsylvania.  We had to leave the most important man in our lives at home, and that was sad, but we still managed to have a good time.

   A few months ago my sister asked us to go with her family to visit her daughter (my niece) in Pennsylvania.  My niece whom we affectionately call "Toydles" has been living there for the summer at a farm that is a haven for girls from troubled homes.  She has been acting as a mentor/mother to the girls while they stay there.  As there are horses at this farm, Toydles is in her element.  She's good at the whole mentor/mother thing.  I admire her greatly.  I couldn't do what she does.

   We started off the trip by an overnight stop in my homeland where we picked up my other nice whom we have nicknamed "Pie".  She was such a blessing because she helped me with the girls and drove most of the way to PA.

   Our first stop was to my brother-in-law's sister who lives in PA.  What an encouraging and fun time!  I thoroughly enjoyed our stop there.  It was fun to get reaquainted with them.  We attended their church on Sunday and I was so encouraged and blessed by the worship service and the sermon!  

   On Monday we drove the 2 hours to the farm where my neice was stationed.  What a beautiful drive! I had no idea that PA was that gorgeous!  I enjoyed looking at the old homes made of stone.  They are so quaint and old fashioned.  I don't know as I'd want to live in one, but they are neat to look at.

   This is the house that Toydles lives in.  It is enormous!  It has four levels and I don't know how many bedrooms.  Some have fireplaces in them!  The only drawback for me was that there wasn't air conditioning.  It was so humid that the air dripped water.  It wasn't raining, but every once in a while you'd feel a drop out of nowhere.  

   The pond you see here is actually fed by a spring on the other side of the house.  The water bubbles up from the ground, flows through the basement of the house and out into this pond.  The water is ice cold.  I'm told that before the frig was invented, they used to put the food stuff that they needed to keep cool in the water that pooled in the basement.  Pretty smart eh!

   I personally fell in love with the upper porch deck.  I sat out there for a while and read a book.  You can catch a nice breeze there and it was so relaxing!

   This is the view from that upper porch.  I couldn't quite capture the whole view, but it was spectacular!  As you can see, there were two ponds. An upper one and a bigger lower one.  

   One evening, my girls decided to go wading with my sister.  I knew that the potential for it to end in disaster was huge, but I agreed anyway.  Just as long as I didn't have to get in the water.  The silt on the bottom was pretty deep and I'm kinda girly when it comes to stepping into something where I can't actually see what is underneath.  As you can see, my little girl tried to give my big girl a hug and it ended in disaster.  My big girl was NOT happy.  

   My big girl got in on a "horsey" ride.  She loved it!  She didn't want to leave the farm.  I'm thinking that she is going to start working on her Daddy to get her a pony.  

   This is my nephew who abhors anything resembling cowboyishness.  He was pretty proud of his cheesy hat.  

   Sister lovin's.  This is pretty much the look that Pie gets whenever threatened with being made to ride a horse.  It's painful to her.  Toydles and her mother are the only two who actually enjoy the beasts.  

   This beast was my 1 year old's nemesis.  She was visiting the goat when it had the audacity to bleat right in her face.  From then on, they were decidedly NOT friends.

   We had a fun time, but we were ready to come home again.  My big girl got sick on the way home.  Took her to the doctor and found out that she had tonsilitis.  Soon after my little girl got it too.  So, they are on antibiotics and are quickly getting better.

   The previous post about corn day actually happened the day after we arrived home, so it really was a busy week.  Good, but tiresome.

   It's good to be home!

   

     

Corn Day

   I can't believe that I'm blogging about a day as mundane as corn day, but this year it was a surprisingly good year!  I usually dread corn day.  Normally the sun is beating down and it's the hottest day of the year.  I do not look forward to the mess and the tracking in and out of people into my house.

Will plan all future corn days around this little machine's availability!

   This year was refreshingly different!  We used to have a hired man whose family did corn with us.  His immediate family (3 young boys), his parents, his sister who usually brought along a few kids, and sometimes a great aunt.  That's a lot of people.  It took HUGE amounts of corn to feed all those people for the winter.  We even did some for another sister of his who lives a state away.  Alas, but our good hired man moved west!  We miss him greatly.  He was a wonderful man who did good work and was like family to us.  However, since there weren't as many people, we didn't have to do as much corn, and there weren't as many people tracking in and out of my house.  This year there were 5 adults and two little helper girls.  MUCH less of a circus.  Although, if we could have our hired man back, I'd gladly put up with the circus for a day.

   My farmer and his Dad picked the corn the evening before.  We got up early the next day and started husking it.

 We rented a machine that took the silks off and washed the corn at the same time.  This saved us HOURS of work!  I highly recommend this nifty little contraption.  You put the cobs in one end and they come out the other clean and ready to work with.  Which is, as my niece would say, "Awesome sauce."

    This little girl in the purple coat, was a good helper!  She handed Grandpa corn so that he wouldn't have to bend over.  She stuck with it until we were done.  I was proud of her!  She was even sick and running a fever that was only controlled by occasional doses of Advil.  She was a trooper!  When they were done with that job, Grandpa gave her a hug and a kiss which made a big impression on her.  She still talks about, "Helping Grandpa's back."  My baby was a pretty good helper too, although her attention span wasn't quite as long.

   My hubby's Grandma came out to help us.  She's a spry little lady!  She is an amazing cook.  (That has nothing to do with my blog post, but I thought I'd just mention that!)  Notice the large amount of corn!  I don't think that was all of it either.  It was way more than we needed, but it's always nice to have a bit extra!

Our sick, but happy girl.  What a gift she is!

My father-in-law manning the kettle.

  Then it's into the kettle to be blanched.  We have this awesome burner system that allows us to cook it outside.  This is great because the mess is outside and not in my kitchen, and the hot is outside and not in my kitchen!

   The next stop after being cooked is into our garage.  We set up tables to cut the corn off the cob.  But first the hot corn is cooled in big vats of ice cold water.  You can see the tubs in the back round of this picture.  The water is so cold that you can't keep your hand in there for more than a few seconds at a time.  The Arctic Circle springs to mind.

   One of the secrets of making corn day go quickly and with much less work are the handy dandy corn cutters we use.  You can see them in the picture above.  It's a circle blade that is expandable so that it will fit any size cob.  There are metal handles attached to the blade.  We cut out square blocks of wood, varnished the snoot out of them and drove a nail up through the bottom.  These are the best corn cutters to ever be invented!  You stab the cob on the nail, push it down to the block of wood, put your cutter on top and push down... and voila!  The whole cob is stripped at once!  (For those of you who are wondering, the cutters can be bought at Wal-Mart, online or at some farm stores.  The Wal-Mart ones have been known to be cheaply made.  Go figure.)

   My girl ended up with two minor wounds when she tried to help cut the corn off.  She gave up after the second band-aid.  I would have too!

   I don't have any pictures of "Yours Truly" bagging the corn, but I was there and I did work.  My job was cutting, bagging, playing nurse, running bagged corn to the house to put in the freezer, dispensing refreshing drinks, threatening dark things to my father-in-law who enjoyed splashing me with the Arctic water, and holding tired little people who needed a bed.

   You wanna know the best part about the whole day?

   It was COOL!!!!!   It barely got to 75 degrees!  That's why my daughter was wearing a jacket in July.  It felt like autumn weather.  It was wonderful!  God couldn't have given us a better day to do corn.  

   Anyway, it's over until next year!  Praise. The. Lord.